#tbt Denim

#tbt Denim

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I wanted to share with you a photoshoot I did back in February that I didn’t get a change to share here.  I loved these pictures so much that I really wanted to create a post, but so much time has passed, hence the #tbt post.  Around when this photos were taken I found out I was pregnant.  At the beginning I felt just fine, but then I slowly started not feeling that great.  My morning sickness consisted of being gross out by food and extremely exhausted.  Thank goodness I never puked, I got nauseous a couple of times.  The most frustrating was not being able to eat because everything sounded so disgusting.  I love food so much it was so hard to not eat whatever I wanted.  I also cook almost every day and that stopped for like three months, being on a diet of PB&J yum!… I slowly started not being my usual self.  You would find me every day laying on bed, not wanting to dress up, put make up on or talk to people.  And this was the worst struggle of pregnancy.  The hormones change really hit me.  I struggle with depression and anxiety for many years, mostly due to hormonal changes.  So going through the most drastic hormonal change of my life, I really fell down literally, no one could take me out of that bed or bedroom.  This is why I disappeared, I just couldn’t do it or make myself.  I needed time to get better, working with my doctors and my family to go through this.  I was so disappointed in myself because I feel everything is my fault or that I shouldn’t feel this way or that I would be judge.  I just wanted everyone to know that this is not the way I wanted to feel and it didn’t have anything to do because I was pregnant  because this was super planned haha.  At the end my baby boy was the most important thing and that is how I am so much better now, back to my old self but with new priorities than before.  I know I’m not the only one but you definitely feel like you are at the moment.

Enough with the sad story and back to happy moments!  My baby shower is this weekend and I am so excited to celebrate baby Atticus with close people in our lives.

Love you all,

Natalia

Photos by Stefanie Keeler

 

 

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Curious Natalia

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